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Candace turns 40 - The Art of Celebrating

I'm going to spend some time this year documenting the celebrations we have for our milestone birthdays- you can read my original post- The Art of Celebrating- for a little background on the why.

Today is the first recap.

Candace.  

She is the most loyal person I know.  She values her friendships and her family like none other.  She is a constant warrior on your side.  You can see what she said about her 30s here.  We are so very fortunate to call Candace our friend.

Now our Candace is 40.  Her current thoughts would be:

I feel great being 40.

I remember when I was 20 & thought 40 was SO OLD!!  But it isn’t.... it’s just twenty 2.0

When I turned 20 I felt I needed to prove I was an adult, have my life all figured out...I didn’t.

Then turning 30 I was excited to start a family & be a mom- to give everything to my little family.

Now turning 40 I feel whole.  I know who I am... more so than I ever did before. I am confident in myself and in the woman I have become. I embrace every laugh line, wrinkle & squishy part. Because that’s me.

So cheers to 40 & all the wonderfulness it is going to bring.

For her 40th, Candace wanted to go out and be wild like we did in our 20s.

Which to be honest, made me groan because sometimes I feel really old (mostly after hard workouts and definitely after shopping at Aritzia) and doing the bar scene most certainly puts me out of my comfort zone. 

But this wasn't about me- this was about Candace, our little social butterfly, who wanted to go out and feel young again for her 40th. 

When you frame it that way- it makes total sense and once I got over myself, it was completely refreshing.

So what did we do for Candace, you ask?

A Footloose and Fancy Free 40th

Step 1: Feel Beautiful

The first step was the feel beautiful because we all know how easy it is to be confidant when you look fabulous.  We booked Candace a full makeup application session at Sephora which was followed by a blow out by her hair dresser back at the hotel.   We had a room booked at the James Hotel so we could comfortably spend the afternoon prepping for a night out but also have a sleepover after.  I mean if you're going to make the night like a night from our 20s, then one must have a sleepover.  Carmen took it a step further and had decorated the room with thoughtfulness.

Step 2: Eat delicious food you don't have to make yourself

Our typical birthday celebration would be a supper out because yay for food and not having to cook or clean up, so of course this was to be included - she picked supper at Congress Beer House where we all ended up ordering the Ace burger. Except Alynne- she was healthy and got salmon or was it pasta?  She's always the rebel.  The food there is so good! Another fave is their buffalo chicken poutine.  This is how we always end up ordering the exact same thing at restos.....

Step 3: Toasts & Speeches & Yummy Drink AND CAKE

After supper we headed over to Winston's pub where we had booked a room in the basement and were joined by her family and more friends.

Remember when you'd get drinks in fishbowls and they'd taste like koolaid? Well that was the level of awesome that Candace (and Carmen) had attained with delicious drinks . Sara, Alynne and I were being the moms and making sure everything happened.  Like toasts to our girl, and cake. Yes, cake. Now when I think cake, I usually think Candace because no one would be surprised if she showed up somewhere with cake.  Her go-to is vanilla with the frosting from Safeway- super sweet and super delicious and super good for you.

Step 4: Party like it's 1999

Our next stop once we were warmed up was to Hudson's which is (I think) the cooler establish for the youngens in YXE? It was crowded and the average age was something we could have birthed, so that was interesting. Some got their dance on, a few good drinks were shared but we couldn't hear anything and / or move  and yes, this is where we felt the oldest and most out of place.  So we left.   Off to Diva's, the local gay bar, where we went to dance into the night.  We should have gone there from the beginning as we felt much more comfortable and even did some speaker dancing like the days of yore.

Step 5: Giggle and Chat into the wee hours of the morning

We were ready to call it a night around 1:30 and walked back to the hotel for my favourite part of going out - sitting around, giggling and telling stories.  I wasn't surprised to see how long this part went when we finally snuggled into bed around 3 am.  The only thing we missed was poutine.

In the end it was a memorable night and we loved celebrating our oldest.

Candace, you are our sister and we love you.  Cheers to your 40s being the best decade yet.

**
Follow along next week as I blog my birthday adventures old school blogging style with nightly recaps of what kind of trouble I got in ALL THE FUN!

* This article was originally published here

Entering my 40s

I've had this post brewing for a couple months now and I finally had the inspiration to piece it together- what better way than while flying over the Atlantic Ocean, en route to a week away with some beautiful women to celebrate life and friendship.
******

I started this blog 10 years ago, two days shy of my 30th birthday.  I know I have my moments where I question the whole online living thing, but when I can look back at my words and memories, captured exactly as how I felt them, then I know that this is something I am meant to do and would love to keep doing as I usher in the next decade of life.

I turn 40 this week.

The funny thing is that I can still very clearly remember that turning 30 feeling.  (The 20s not so much...probably cause all the booze).  I recall thinking it was so old to be 30.  I felt like such a grown up.  Except at that stage in my life I was so far down the vortex of becoming a parent that I really had no concept of who I was.  Just as I'm sure that when I turn 50 I will dig back to this post that I'm composing on a flight while sipping a sparkly and much too sweet Italian wine and eating some very salty nuts.  
Ha. Nuts.  
I'm getting older but no one said I was more mature.   
I'm sure at 50 I will remember that feeling of celebrating a milestone birthday, thinking of how I had the world figured out when in reality I was still evolving.  

That leaves me with the question- did I ever have a true sense of self or have I always been changing?

Here's how I see it.  

First half of my life was spent under the tutelage of my parents and learning to become a kind, loving and responsible human.  I pushed boundaries, formed foundational friendships and lived experience that would mold me into the person I am now.   The people in my life were mostly there because of circumstance.  I realized my love for the french language at 17.  I gained an appreciation for the arts by studying piano and singing.  I fell in love with my sports: volleyball, ringette and fastball.  I wouldn't say I was overly deep or reflective and the only form of my thoughts that I have recorded are in letters written to friends and boyfriends.  I learned how to family from the best.  I was just a fraction of who I am now at that point.

The next decade, my 20s-30s were spent finding myself.  You know the elusive things that you absolutely have to attain by a certain age- a husband, kids, a home, a career.  All of those happened for me in my 20s. I feel like these were all very big wins for me.  Dan is my perfect match and has enraptured me since day one.  I loved every minute of my teaching career and was thrilled to get to start it off back at my alma mater, teaching my brother.   I still played my sports but most of my time was spent setting up my life.  We bought a house, got married and had our first babe.  I had no clue who I was in my 20s because really I feel like those years were spent chasing dreams.

The 30s were a whirlwind. It's so hard to know yourself when you haven't slept a full night rendering you mostly useless and your body has been morphed and stretched into something unrecognizable, making you feel like an inflated former version of yourself.  I reread the post I wrote on my 30th birthday ( you can read it here and you can see the amazing party they threw me here )

One thing that stuck out was re-reading my wish list for my 30s

There are many things I'd like to do in the next decade, I'll leave you today with a glimpse of what's to come.......

1-I'd love to have 3 or 4, possibly 5 kids.

2-I want to change careers and do something more creative, possibly videography/video-editing.

3- I want to grow to become the parent for Willis that my parents were for me. They are truly wonderful.

4-I want to fall in love with Dan more each day and find ways to keep things interesting...any suggestions?

5-I want to cherish my friends, old and new. I'm so lucky to have a solid group of girlfriends from high school, which is a rarity, and a BFF for the past 25 years, but there are also old friendships that I want to rekindle with people who were once so important to me and friends I don't see as much as I'd like to. So, to sum that one up : focus on maintaining friendships.

***
And here I am standing on the cusp of my 40s, approaching the decade that finds me with the most free time I've had in ages, a new career (yes, I made a creative change!) and these wonderful kids that Dan and I are blessed to be raising (kinda thankful there aren't 4 or 5 of them)  For me, my 40s means I get to fulfil the dreams and goals I have been building all the while feeling, as Candace so eloquently put it, feeling whole. 

I AM HERE, I AM ME

And while I know I don't have the whole picture figured out and I'm sure I'm going to change tons in the next 10 years, there are some things I am certain of.

I am built tough physically- my body is strong and sexy AF and I wouldn't change that for anything.  I feel beautiful the majority of the time.
Also, I'm strong emotionally- having lost some wonderful friends and family in the past 20 years has taught me where I stand on this earth and value of the blessings we have in our earthly life.
I will be married to one man my whole life, he is my rock and I love him to bits.
My friends are the pillars that hold me up.
My family will always be at my side.

And in the end, if that's all I have, then I am pretty damn grateful and blessed.  

As for my goals for the next 10 years? Let me think on that one....I have some cheese and wine and bread and chocolate to consume on my trip with these three inspiring women and I'm certain that at the end of it, I'll have a clearer picture of who I am and who I want to become.

Stay tuned each night for an update on our adventures.

* This article was originally published here

Tour de France: Travel Day

I probably shouldn't have got it in my head that I had to blog every night because tonight is the night that the lack of sleep is getting me.   I keep dozing while trying to put the thoughts together.
But I suppose that is typical of travel day.  We overnighted from Toronto and managed to get 4ish hours of sleep in our little pods.  Then we had a couple hours to waste before catching the 3ish hours train to the south of France.

We dozed a little and chatted some more and were very happy to finally arrive at our destination of Aix-en-Provence.  We had a really hard time narrowing down where we wanted to go because all areas looked amazing...we were going back and forth to just staying in Paris, to doing the north, to doing the German side or the Swiss side or the French Riviera....so basically everywhere.  We finally decided on the smaller university city because we wanted to get a more small town vibe and BAM, it is exactly what we expected: cute cozy streets lined with shops and restaurants.

We found our airbnb (a first for me) and were instantly in love with the frenchness of it.  I can't wait to explore more.

We were extremely exhausted but needed food and Abbie's FrenchFriend, Phil, was in town to visit us.  We ate, we chatted, we giggled excessively and we walked the cute streets.  Naturally, we all ordered the same things (Croque Madames) and drank the same beers (1664)

I hope to be more wordy tomorrow to fully capture the moments but DAMN, I'm tired. We're all heading to bed right now so we can be fully recharged for our wine tour day tomorrow.
Bonne nuit.

you can read my thoughts on turning 40 here

* This article was originally published here

Day 2: the one with the small towns and all the wine.

Ah, what a great day: wine, small towns and tons of learning.  But so sad to hear that Notre Dame is burning in Paris...that was the one place I had on my list to see....after so many years reading Le Bossu to grade 9s, I just wanted to go inside.  Sigh.

We all had great sleeps after zombietravel day and were pumped to see some small towns...which is definitely not something I ever say.  Can you imagine touring small town Saskatchewans? Wait- maybe we should make that a thing.

Anyway, we grabbed a quick breakfast at the boulangerie (fancy croissant sausage thingies) (we're totally fancy french) for our small group tour of wine and small towns.   Nothing like getting day drunk before 10 am.

We hit up 2 estates, or domaines and enjoyed all the wine.  Did you know that rosé is the specialty in this region? I did not.  Thankfully most of the wine was white and they were all really good and left us giddier than normal.   I'm still breaking up with red wine though, just in case you were wondering.
Important information of course.

The second half our day was spent town hoping- we went to three very beautiful small towns that were so very different.

The first was Lourmarin where we ate a very french meal (in that we didn't recognize any of the foods on the menu and ordered them anyway and the waiter was very aloof and kinda shrugged us off when we asked what he recommended) and then we browsed the shops and Abbie channeled her inner Abbie and found some amazing pieces and I didn't shop (shocker) but facetimed my cute kids instead.  Also,  at this point I was sobering up from our morning adventures and needed some headache meds.
Anyway, Lourmarin was enchanting with its tiny streets, colourful buildings and it had a very calm vibe with people just sitting around enjoying the beautiful day.

Second town was Roussillon which is right on the ochre cliff sides and the most beautiful rustic colours- seriously felt like we were walking around in a painting. Also almost bought a painting but didn't and took a picture of it instead.   We had a hard time deciding which of the small towns was our favourite but in the end, this one was mine.  It was magical and we had crepes  (Michelle had two and got a funny look from the waiter.  Sorry dude, we're the type of girls who eat).   Also, there was a cat wandering around like it owned the place, which he probably did.

Last stop was the hillside town of Gordes which is built into a cliff and was pretty damn cool but at this point we were cold (okay mostly stay-puffed marshmallow Jordan who wears 22 layers of clothing) and ready to go home for 2nd supper.

We came home to the news that Notre Dame was on fire and spent a sombre 2nd supper out for moules and pasta and now we're sharing photos, singing songs and breaking open a bottle of wine that we brought home from our touring.    Bonne nuit!

you can read my thoughts on turning 40 here
Day one: travel day is here






* This article was originally published here

Day 3: We drank all the wine and bought all the things

We completely embraced the french life today and did a number of things:
- we walked around the beautiful city of Aix-en-Provence.
- we shopped and picked up some "France-inspired" pieces.
- we put our phones away and enjoyed the day.
- we sat around and broke bread.
- we drank all the wine.  Literally.

Today was actually my favourite day.  There were a lot of really long meals embraced by great conversations about everything from faith, to parenting to sex to relationships.  It was one of those days where friendships were solidified and we were able to open about and share.  Almost better than therapy.
Then there was the wandering and shopping and just enjoying a french town.

Needless to say, too much wine was had and this post will have to cut short because, well, let's be real- I'm seeing double and it's really hard to type.

Gotta be a sign of a good day, non?

* This article was originally published here

Day 4: A Day in Marseille

One of the hardest parts planning this trip was figuring just where we wanted to go in France - we were all over the map.  In the end we decided we wanted to go south and focus on small town.  Our 3 days in Aix-en-Provence were precisely that and the only thing I regret is not getting to the Avignon area.  We also decided that we wanted to see Marseille and then fly from there back up to Paris.  Here is my other regret- apparently a neighbouring town, Cassis is quite the gem.  I wish we would have booked a night so we could have done some exploring.  Ah well, next time.

So today we headed down to Marseille for our day of exploration.  Again- 800000000 things to do and tough time making decisions.  In the end we ditched our luggage using the very cool service, NannyBag that let's you dump your stuff at a hotel for a fee.   We decided to take a stroll around the port, hopping on a hop on/hop off bus so we could maximize the seeing and learning of things.

Our goal was to get up to the giant church, Notre Dame de la Garde.  I quite enjoyed the ride and almost wished we had more time for the stop at the beach.  I totally would have swam in that.  The church was beautiful but I almost liked the cathedral we saw in Aix better- the simplicity was more spiritual.  Also, how amazing is it to be able to sit in places that were built hundreds of years ago?

The next stop was the Mucem/old Fort place to walk through the fortifications of the old city.  THEN we stumbled upon the rental scooter thingies and had the most amazing adventure scootering through the port.  Best 4 euros spent!

We're getting really good at eating the french way, totally unplugged, maximal people watching and leisurely enjoying our meals.  I don't think I've ever spent so much time just simply enjoying food.

Our last adventure was to stop and get me a little pre birthday present...eeeek!

Now we're sitting in our hotel right next door to Versailles, eagerly awaiting our day of learning tomorrow!

* This article was originally published here

Day 5: We covered so much ground

I am almost too tired to write this post because it was a jammed packed day and I'm about done.

We started in Versailles with a whirlwind tour- covering everything and learning as much as possible in a small amount of time.  Also, renting the golf cart to cover the grounds when you don't have all day was superb. Eating macaroons is also wonderful.

If I could do our day again, I would have known and found out about the bike rental, found a baguette and just spent the day exploring the woods.  If I have solidified any belief in myself during this trip, it has been that I am a wide open spaces and no crowds type of girl. 

We got to our flat in Paris (right on the Seine across from the Louvre) in the afternoon and kinda just wanted to stay in it because it is the cutest place (see it here) but we decided that we should adventure, so we walked a billion miles up to Sacre Coeur.  I loved the Montmartre area and definitely could spend some more time exploring it.   

We did a quick look inside, climbed the 300 steps up to the dome for the view and then headed out to find some food.

I think the food may be a huge highlight of this trip.  Abbie has a wonderful french friend who recommended some restos and holy crap it was great.

Seriously, I'm way too tired to add any intricate details to this post so this will have to do.  We're just settling in for the night before our last day in Paris!

Bonne nuit!

* This article was originally published here